Do you ever turn away from joy?
Do overly content people make you feel uncomfortable?
Have you ever withdrawn from the world, believing that no one else would understand why? Knowing that no one else could understand?
Are you ever just too tired, worn down or exhausted to even try to explain what is going on?
Believe it or not, there are more of us in that boat than you would imagine.
I would hazard that almost all of us, at one point or another, have experienced this kind of disconnect in our lives. For an unfortunate few, it is an ongoing event without respite.
There are many causes for our feelings of isolation, loneliness, and disconnection. Over the last 24 years, I have listened to stories, memories, and experiences of clients and found that neglect, abuse of all kinds (physical, emotional, sexual), physical injury, the death of loved ones and many other types of trauma can lead to dissociation from self, others and life in general.
When we experience loneliness, or we feel isolated such experiences impact not only us but our families, friends and the community as a whole.
How can we heal that? How can someone who is deeply hurt, begin to recover from their isolation and disassociation?
In sessions with my clients, I noticed and continue to notice that the brighter notes in their lives that uplift them or bring harmony tend to be experiences in nature.
There is a somewhat controversial hypothesis put forward by Edward Wilson called Biophilia Hypothesis that I lean towards. It is the idea that humans evolved as creatures deeply enmeshed with the intricacies of nature and that we still have this affinity with nature ingrained in our genotype.
Perhaps that is why when we connect with nature, we heal faster. We reconnect to our roots. We feel home and belonging. Of course, it doesn’t heal everything or address the many complexities inherent with trauma, but it does present a starting point.
In studies across the board- prison inmates, patients in hospitals — those who have a view of a natural landscape recover more quickly. Currently, studies are showing that children in natural playgrounds versus concrete playgrounds are likely to think more creatively, play cooperatively and invent their own games.
Nature offers healing balm to our sufferings and it is within reach for all of us. It can be the sky above or the sound of the wind. It can be a blade of grass or the trees along the highway.
If we look to nature and begin to seek her out with more regularity, not only as part of our search for wholeness but as a place to play and celebrate we can begin to soothe the neural networks that make us feel isolated and lonely.
It doesn’t matter what time of year or day it is; nature is always available to take us in. We just need to make the first move and begin a process of healing and wholeness.
Here are 3 simple ways to help you make the first move with nature:
1 Make a date with nature – find a park or a trail that you can go on and set a date on your calendar. Plan a picnic or shop for some delicious treats t0 take with you. Make it something to look forward to.
2 Invite a friend or family member to join you – sometimes it is easier to go into nature by taking a buddy along with you.
3 Take time to connect with the nature around you when in the park or on the hike. Use all your senses. Smell the air, listen to the sounds, feel the textures around you and observe what you feel.
If you feel afraid or unsure of yourself, don’t worry. Take a few breaths and ease into the experience. Step by step, moment by moment you will begin to connect. Make a commitment to do this more than once in a while and you will find your way home.