Leo stands in front of me, looking intently at me, not as my child but just as himself. I look back at him with the same awareness. Then I see him move slightly to the side and I see a little boy.
My eyes focus on the little boy. It’s Leo, age 4. My heart swells with the recognition of that Leo, so sweet and so full of love. I recognize that that little Leo is still alive and kicking and our connection and warmth is in our cells and minds. My eyes switch to the teen Leo in front of me and I nod in knowing.
Then I see family members, my sister, brother, husband, friends, each of them as they are now and their child self. I keep walking and nodding. Something is beginning to take shape in my consciousness.
I take in my environment for a moment and register that I am walking in this Eden like garden where I can hear birds and waterfalls. It is lush, green and fecund with life. I feel the presence of my loved ones and their child selves who are open, loving, bright, gorgeous beings.
My heart feels like it’s going to burst with love and emotions of deep recognition of each person.
I wake up, my body pulsing with the electricity of knowing rippling in every cell. I wake up with an answer to a question I didn’t know I was inquiring about.
I wake up feeling like I have discovered a new resource. A resource that would allow me to love on difficult days, difficult people. Even during confrontations and conflicts. I wake up realizing that for the child in us, the kind of love we want is very simple and the kind of love we give us as a child is without pretense or costumed.
As I lay in bed, I wondered, what would happen if during a difficult conversation I saw the child self of the person in front of me?
Maybe I would soften my edges.
Maybe I’d allow for a smile or even drop the conversation.
Maybe I would see the child and offer love.
Because that’s what the child in me would want to do.