by Navjit Kandola
Meet and greets. Hellos and goodbyes. First impressions and lasting impressions all speak about who we are in relation to others.
Whether it is loved ones or total strangers we are meeting, one fact is true: we get to choose what part of us they experience. Some people prefer to wait a while before they trust someone enough to show their love. Others start with hugs and kisses.
Here’s my question for you: how would you like to be in relationships? Whether with strangers or loved ones?
Perhaps you would open yourself to be more loving, kind, or trusting. Maybe you want to trust yourself more, and let yourself be relaxed and good natured.
Let’s explore that potential today.
Here we go:
Take a couple of deep breaths into your body, and close your eyes. Breathe as deeply as you can, and exhale out through your mouth with a burst of breath. Do this a few times.
Now, begin to breathe in your natural rhythm. Listen to your breath and your thoughts. Allow them to quiet down.
Once you feel the quiet, ask your body where it holds those qualities (kindness/love/openness, etc.) that you would like to feel when in relationships. Give yourself a moment to feel into those qualities, and tune into the places/s where your body holds them.
What do they feel like? Warmth? Energy? Light? Take your time to recognize these feelings, and open your awareness to how they amplify and nourish your sense of self.
Now, imagine filling up with these qualities until they spill out from your body, flowing into the room, your home, and then out into the world. Continue with this exercise until you are full. Then, when you are ready, take another deep breath and open your eyes.
The world is only a breath away from being a “better” place. We’re lucky to have the chance to contribute to this possibility through the choices we make every day. Imagine the world we could create if everyone we met experienced firsthand the kindness in us, or the love in us. I feel that would make the world feel a great deal safer and friendlier – one greeting, kiss, or gesture at a time.
by Navjit Kandola
Today’s meditation is really simple. So simple, in fact, that it’s guaranteed to bring a smile to your face. Curious? Wonderful.
Here we go:
Part One
Take a couple of deep, deep breaths into your body and close your eyes. Exhale the breaths in a clear, focused manner. Continue to breathe in this way until you feel a refreshed calm deep within you. Once you anchor into that energy, take another deep breath, and bring your awareness to your face. Tune into the energy in your face. Is it saggy or serious? Do your lips smile or frown?
Whatever expression you may be holding, let it go, and allow your face to blossom into your most radiant smile. Try a few different ones, until you feel the glow of your perfect, most natural smile surfacing. Imagine every single cell on your face breaking out into the same grin.
Allow this smiling energy to flow through your whole body, lifting each part – from the tips of your toes to the ends of your hair – in a cellular celebration.
Breathe in. Smile. Breathe out. Smile. Stay in this joyous meditation for as long as you like, and then when you are ready, take a deep breath and open your eyes.
Part Two
Breathe deeply into your body, and continue with this smile meditation. Smile with your eyes, your lips, and all the trillions of cells in your body. This is an easy, easy meditation to practice, and others will join in as you smile at them.
Do not be afraid to release your gorgeous smile out into the world. Let it ignite much joy and happiness!
I’d love to see your shining face. Post your beautiful smile on my Facebook page, and come and check out mine.
by Navjit Kandola
Anger can be like a category 5 hurricane – a Katrina in your body.
Or it can be silent, cold, and deadly as rattlesnake’s venom.
It can be ugly and devastating, physically and emotionally.
In my angriest moments, I know I am not rational. But I suit up to battle to the end. All I think about is attacking my opposition, and causing enough damage to be victorious. My adrenaline flows, and my senses are heightened. I do not see the other person as a human being, but rather as an obstacle.
I do not think anger is a single emotion, but rather a culmination of many. If we were to strip away its outer layers, I’m sure we would uncover pain, frustration, but most importantly, fear. Fear of losing control, fear of humiliation, fear of inadequacy seeded with self doubt….
So for today’s meditation, let’s clear out any residual anger or fear we may be hiding within ourselves.
Sit down in a comfortable position. Take a deep breath, and close your eyes. Allow yourself to adjust to your awareness within. Breathe into your wholeness and clarity.
When you are ready, take another deep breath and ask your body where it is holding anger. You may feel it or sense it. It could be your stomach or your foot – just take the first place that comes into your awareness.
What does your anger feel or look like? What is your anger communicating? Listen carefully and consciously. Is there a story or a past hurt that feeds your anger? Again, allow yourself to know it – become familiar with it consciously, so you can recognize it.
Now, ask that place in your body what color it wants to release the anger.
Take the first color that comes into your awareness, and imagine it coming in from the universe, directly into the place where your anger resides. Imagine the color gently dissolving the anger, washing it away permanently. You may feel a shift or a tingling sensation. Take as much color as you need.
Once that holding space has cleared, take a couple of deep breaths and open your eyes.
Our emotions are a gift to us. We are just beginning to recognize their power. We can use them to enhance, but also easily destroy the very things we cherish and love.
In moments when you feel you may be holding onto residual negativity like anger or fear, take a few minutes to do this exercise and refresh your spirit. Deepen your connection to wholeness, and allow your heart to re-open its doors.
by Navjit Kandola
Come with me.
Breathe in. Smile. Breathe out. Smile.
Close your eyes.
Breathe in. Smile. Breathe out. Smile.
Whatever is missing, let it go.
Breathe in.
Smile.
Breathe out.
Smile.
Continue: breathe in, smile, breathe out, smile.
The planets dance in orbit. The sun is shining. The grass is growing.
Whatever is missing, let it go.
You are here. Breathe in. Smile. Breathe out. Smile.
That is enough.
Life is complex and simple. It is massive: filled with belly busting ha ha ha’s, aha!’s, and epiphanies.
Do good. Make love.
Open your eyes.
Happy new year.
I love you.
Image credit: By Another Road, Jan L Richardson
by Navjit Kandola
This past year moved at a fast clip, peppered with some heart-wrenching breakdowns, and triumphant breakthroughs. Some of us approached it with dread – fearing the fulfillment of the Mayan prophecy – whilst others readied themselves for a golden age.
2012, I’d say you did your job. You made us braver, and sobered us. Patience, kindness and tender thoughts showed us a way to grace, and hopefully we will continue to learn the value of kinship, and the interrelatedness of all life.
And now, before we sing Auld Lang Syne and say goodbye to 2012, let’s take a moment to wrap this year up, energetically and soulfully.
For this meditation, carve out some time so you can give it your full attention and heart. Open your consciousness with courage, reflect, and listen within.
Here we go.
Take a beautiful deep breath into your whole, wondrous body. Give yourself some time, and listen for the stillness.
On your next deep breath, ask your Higher Self (HS) to show you if you have any loose ends that still need tying up. It might be a buried situation in a relationship, or at work. It could be related to your health, or a dream. Take your time and listen.
Ask your HS questions, and feel into the nature of that which is coming into your awareness.
There may be several things that need your attention. Listen fully to all of them. They may be related, or completely separate issues. Inquire into each one, and ask what gift they need from you in order to come into completion. The gift could be a symbol, object, or color. Whatever form it takes, imagine it coming from the universe and straight to the place your body is holding the issue/s or themes that need closure.
Give yourself as much time as you need to soak in this gift. Feel your body begin to quieten, and take a moment to thoroughly absorb the sensation of calm that results. Some themes may need more time, enquiry or deep thought – give them that space and time.
Once you have created this completion with 2012, take a deep breath and imagine white light coming in from the universe through the top of your head, filling your whole body and then lasering out through your solar plexus. What does that feel like for you? Nourishing? Energizing? Continue with this exercise until you feel a shift – it could be a softness or lightness or quiet. It is all perfect.
Now breathe and allow 2013 to arise in your consciousness from a place of stillness and inner knowing.
Thank you for letting me be a part of your journey this year. Here’s to you my friends and Auld Lang Syne, click the image below to sing with me.
See you in 2013
by Navjit Kandola
‘Tis the season of joy, generosity, and spending quality time with the people you love… but we all know sometimes, it can be a bit much.
Political discussions heaped with sarcasm at the dinner table. Petty squabbles with siblings. Misunderstandings, old rivalries surfacing, and points getting completely lost in translation. These are the less lovely aspects of the holidays.
So this week, I’d like to revisit a post from the early days of Tenderlogic. I’m sharing it with you again because, especially at this time of year, it’s important to remember there are better ways to share and communicate – ways that don’t involve frustrated sighs, snorts, and slammed doors.
Singing yourself into a better place
For some reason, since my son was born, I’ve found myself bursting out with lyrics from songs or nursery rhymes that I don’t remember learning. My most recent outburst was “Anything you can do I can do better” from Annie Get Your Gun. The classic show tune is a playful duet between the two star-crossed protagonists, Annie and Frank. They boast about their accomplishments, and attempt to outdo one another with their singing talents.
(Give it a listen! The link is below.)
I love this song, especially because I can identify with Annie’s competitiveness and sass when I’m discussing/debating/arguing with my husband (and sometimes a few other lucky souls). But I must admit – I usually don’t have as much fun as Frank and Annie seem to be having.
We can learn about our own arguing habits by watching these two belt out their claims. If you look closely, you’ll notice each of them waits for the other to say their line. They make their points clearly and succinctly (usually in one or two sentences), and allow for lulls and pauses. It’s an exchange – a dance. When was the last time you left space for silence in a confrontation?
I think if I incorporated the singing aspect into my own ‘spirited debates’, the outcome could be better. Imagine how different business meetings, debates, and arguments would be if we sang and danced what we were attempting to communicate. Remember: when we converse and interact, our entire body shares a dialogue all its own. Would we be able to express more with a tune and free body movement?
Think back to a recent debate you found yourself in. What would have been clearer if you’d been able to illustrate your point in a musical fashion? While bursting into song in the middle of an argument may seem a bit odd, it doesn’t hurt to think along those guidelines.
Here’s an exercise for you. Next time you’re in a meeting, discussion or argument think along the lines of a song in a musical:
- Express yourself – what would your song be? A melancholy aria? A joyful chorus? A head-banging rock n’ roll anthem? A whiny violin?
- Simplify your speech – e.g “I hear you” or “What can we do to make it better?” or “I am not happy with this situation but I am ready to turn it around”
- If you feel yourself bristling, take a few deep breaths and relax your body as best you can. Tensing your muscles only creates more discomfort.
- Put mean-spiritedness aside – being reactive or petty does not create solutions
- Wait for your turn – give yourself some time to consider what the other is saying before responding.
- Allow for the interludes – silence can be great. New solutions can be found as we contemplate what has been said
So, have a listen to the song by clicking below…
and the next time you’re doing a round in the ring with your husband, child or business partner, remember: you can sing yourselves into a better space.
As we move into 2013 and the next journey ‘round the sun for Tenderlogic, I wish you the fluidity of love, patience, and abundance.
